Smallness Transformed

I sat on my cushion releasing my heart's prayers. For a six year old boy undergoing brain surgery. A mother whose adult child simply did not wake up and no reason is known. For others facing grief, sadness, uncertainty, and lacking the basic water, food and shelter of life. I am but one and sometimes feel so old, frail, and inadequate. My simple little prayers but they are so so earnest and felt. Then to open my eyes and see such a gift. The sun and morning had gathered my little simple prayers and were streaming them into the universe. Never doubt. Never stop praying. Life truly hears and responds.

Choosing Magic Choosing Grace

This morning on my walk I noticed a solitary deer as I walked back. She stood in the flat grasses as I stood and watched. My little heart opened. As I moved to walk on she slowly walked parallel to me. I stopped. She stopped and turned her head and watched me. Sometimes she would move in my direction, then pause and we would chat. A couple of times she pranced, not an escaping bound but a prancing like a thoroughbred horse. Sweet mercy so beautiful.  We walked parallel for a bit. I thought maybe she might like to be on the other side where the lake is, so I stopped and told her I would wait. She stared at me and then slowly walked ahead in my direction. Paused and looked at me and then crossed prancing to the other side. I watched until she was well on her way, and saw her look and we said good morning and good bye.

I thought of the morning. How my body not perky made me linger just a bit before I left. How my little dog and I stood for a few moments by the car to take in all we could see. And then on the walk, to linger against the Old One Trees. To stop briefly and touch the most amazing delicate blue flowers. Little pauses or speed ups here and there and was gifted my friend the doe who walked with me.

To another who may or may not have seen the doe, other explanations are easily offered. But perhaps, I ponder, that is indeed the thread…how we choose to see what we choose to see.

30 minutes

Good morning Sweet Life. Thank you for eyes that opened this morning. Thank you for eyes that could see dark turn into light. Thank you for awakening in a warm bed within a house protected from the weather. Thank you for a home with an address. Thank you for a body that arose out of bed without assistance. Thank you for legs that could slide off the bed and touch the floor. Thank you for legs that supported my body to walk. Thank you for a kitchen that I can enter and be fed. Thank you for coffee and hot drink. Thank you for hands and arms that can reach for these gifts of abundance. Thank you for the computer that connects me with the world. Thank you for the electricity that turns lights, computers and coffee pots on. Thank you for a couch to sit upon. Thank you for the earth which gifted all the materials for this home, bed, food, and drink. Thank you for music. Thank you for the sense of touch and ears that can hear. Thank you for all the hands that touched, worked, and created all the things I have already touched, I see and hear. Thank you for clean clothes to put on and all the gifts of the threads from the earth. Thank you for each beat of my heart already passed unnoticed and for each breath that sustained me through the night and continued to beat when my eyes opened.

Thank you sweet life that at this moment, this very moment as I write, 7 billion people are waking to their day or gathered in the sleep I have awakened from. We each are in this moment right now held in your sweet hands. Thank you for the earth that is holding each 7 billion of us and all of nature, plant and animal life maintained by the air, sun and moon. Thank you sweet life for the 30 minutes of arising as one with all of life. Thank you sweet life. Thank you sweet life.

Thank you sweet life for the miracles of these 30 minutes. Thank you for the gifts of this day and all minutes filled with abundance and joy no different than these 30 minutes recorded that I have called mine. Thank you sweet life that each minute that follows will be as sacred and mine to choose how, what, where, of all I will see, feed, smell, touch, hear, and move towards or from. Sometimes it amazes me all the minutes that can occur in such a short span of life. How these 30 minutes become 24 hours and flow one after another. How will they flow? Once I put this pen down how will I move? What will I see? What will I feel? What will my heart record as “happening” to me? What will I record as gifts? What will I record as grace? What will I ….will?

All

To awaken shortly after midnight, not knowing why, and discovering during the two hours I had slept, giggle, I had gathered my gratitude stone in my stutter hand and was holding it.  This quote was my first “People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don't even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child -- our own two eyes. All is a miracle ~ Thich Nhat Hanh.   And ALL includes me, you, All.

And this evening as tween time fell upon the earth, closing up the house a feather I should not have been able to see called to my eyes.  A perfect white feather, but you could see a faint hint of gray in the light.  I cannot think which of the birds could have left such a gift. 

“All is a miracle” ~ Thich Nhat Hanh.   And ALL includes me, you, All.

For the Rains to Come

I need to go to the store. I am almost out of coffee and creamer.  I cannot blame the coffee for being bitter.  I cannot blame the cup for being empty.  If I do not reach, walk towards while opening my hands to receive the gifts, I cannot blame the sweet Hands of Life for not hearing the longings of my heart and soul.

And as I walked a new mountain path, beyond my path, lay a forest and earth ravaged by fire. The earth dry and parched needing rain knowing even that need will cause more scarring upon the scorched earth, but rain it needs. There, clinging to a barren branch, ever so tiny in size, was a small clinging red thread. Like the scorched earth, my body made the journey seeking healing knowing in the granting of hope would come the rain.  

Every choice I make is a choice of regret, grievance and hopelessness or a miracle. Today I let get go of regret, grievance and hopelessness and choose the miracle. [paraphrased from "A Course in Miracles"]